mothers

festivities

IMG_2581

Mothers are oceans;

they have unfathomable depths.

My mother lost her mother

too long ago for me to know anything

of her but her children & husband’s recollections;

I know little of my grandmother,

save from photo albums in our basement.

My mother feels her absence deeply, I suspect.

Moms are fickle things;

we only know them as they are now,

not who they were when they were younger,

if we were lucky enough to know them at all.

Looking through a meticulous scrapbook of my her childhood,

I learned more about my mother as a woman,

and not as “Mom”.

The more I see,

the harder she is to read.

image

just how are your eyes this blue?

This year I’m away at school,

and I’ve taken up the habit to ask her,

“how is Noreen?”

and not

“how are you, Mom?”

while on the phone.

It’s a not slight,

nor so much an

“oh, I’m an adult now, so I’ll call you by your first name”

situation,

as it is that I am asking her how she is

as a person

separate from her mothering identity.

image

she likes to hike!

I’m named after my grandmother.

As often as I am proud,

saying,
“I was the grandchild named in her honor”

I am afraid, too.

The name is heavy.

There is a weight to this bequeathed crown,

the etymology matters less than

the namesake;

her appellation is my inheritance.

My mother’s patience and imagination

balanced truly remarkably

with her diligence and industriousness.

I will never understand how she has accomplished everything she has;

and has kept her head, too.

Mom,

I would like to thank you for your kindness,

your hair-stroking (and coloring),

you humor,

and for that time we sat in the great big refrigerator box in the front yard,

eating something out of the carton.

Thank you for your faith in me,

thank you for your trust,

and your love.

I love you, too.

You are wonderful,

and will always be wonderful,

and a wonder,

in my book.

I will never reach your sea-floor

and uncovered all your opal hopes and quiet desires,

but in my book,

you’re always a favorable character,

tough, and beautiful,

vulnerable and valiant.

I want to watch Brave with you, again.

Plot twist:

I think you are more like Merida,

and I’m Elinor.

Lots & lots & garden plots

of

♥ love ♥

xoxo

Your daughter,

Carey

photographic edits 9 June 2016

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One thought on “mothers

  1. I’m very impressed with this up and coming writer. She has a natural talent and obvious passion for the small details in life. I’m looking forward to reading more!

    Liked by 1 person

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